My heart is feeling very tender today. I woke up thinking about my father and how long it’s been since he’s been gone. It’s 40 years today. My Katie wasn’t even a year old when he died. The kids never got to know him or he them. I’ve forgotten the sound of his voice and how he smelled of pipe tobacco. And for today, I’m feeling so sad about all the years he’s missed. But I do take comfort in believing that he’s watching over us all. I think he’d be pleased that we are living in Maine. He loved Maine (my mother did not) just as we do. I think of him with a smile when I see the wild birds here, when my husband is snow blowing and covered in snow, when I’m working in the gardens pulling up weeds and pitching little rocks. He died when I was 26 years old, just shy of 27, in his car, in his garage, under strange circumstances. We will never have the answers but I have to believe that he suffered a heart attack. I’ve grown up, raised a family, got divorced, started a new life at 50, lost my mother, found my big brother, got remarried, and moved three times since he died. A lot of life happened. I have to believe that he’d be proud of me and of my kids because we’ve all had a strong work ethic and have built good lives. I’m now older than he was when he died by a good margin. It’s funny how some years this day barely hits my consciousness and others it hits me (like this year) right in the solar plexus!

Today I’m putting my body to work and figuring out how to add a little spot in my atelier for a sleeping nook for our granddaughter when she comes to visit this summer. She’s still too little to send up to sleep on the third floor and yet she’s too big for the pack and play crib she’s slept in when she was here last year. We have lots of stairs in our house and in the dark, they’re a danger to little people so we’re making it safe for her so we all sleep better and I hope she’ll love it. My plan is to make her a quilt for her bed (she wants purple) and create a “nook” where she can sleep in a “big girl” bed without a crib to contain her. It’ll be interesting. Right now I’ve taken all of the bins and books out of my big IKEA shelf and we’ll move it to a different position creating a “wall” for her space. I’d like to make a sleeping platform that my walking pad and ironing boards can store away under. And one or two of the boxes in the IKEA “wall” will hold her books and stuffed friends. I’ll knit a heart for her wall just like she has at home and maybe we can paint the back of the shelf (it’ll need some plywood to make it safe) purple for her. It’ll be a project but it’ll be her space for now.

This week was a good and busy week. I had a board meeting on Wednesday, worked on Thursday and yesterday I taught. I’ve been working on deep cleaning/spring cleaning the ceiling fans and cobwebs and windows and rugs and I can’t wait to be able to open some windows and get fresh air into the house. I’m starting to feel stifled by stale air! It’s supposed to be warm-er today so I may risk opening my atelier windows … and maybe I’ll hit them with a bit of windex and elbow grease. (So much for my manicure!)

I’ve finished my Cardoon pullover. I have blocked it and only need to trim all the ends that I wove in and add a label and try it on one last time. I hope the fit will have improved post-blocking. I was chatting with a friend the other day and was trying to remember if I’d done a gauge swatch for this sweater and I couldn’t remember and didn’t make notes on my Ravelry project page. So, I’m going to assume that I started knitting the yoke and measured my gauge there. Not the best way to do it but I’m generally pretty close to gauge. I did have to block the sweater pretty aggressively to get it to the proper measurements on the schematic but I hope it’s going to be a good fit and wearable this coming week. I’ll post a photo when I have my shower and try it on.

I loved the yarn and the pattern, as all of Isabell’s patterns, was well-written and easy to follow. It really was a pleasure to knit … too bad I waited so long to knit it! LOL

Yesterday at work I started the sleeves for my Bolin Cardigan. The cardigan is cropped which may or may not suit me but I’m knitting on. I love the big 6×6 cables running down the sleeve and I’m eager to see how it all comes together. I’m hoping it will be something I can wear with a tunic and jeans or dress. I got about four inches of sleeve done … one twenty round repeat and a second cable twist … I’ll work on it again tonight.

Gone knitting!