Queen Bee Knits

Knitting, Living, Loving, Baking, Tips, Tools and Idle Chatter

Free Knitting Pattern (and a little lesson)

Posted on May 18, 2011 by Queen Bee Knits

You may (or may not) know that I had my French daughter, her husband and baby boy here for a visit. We’d not seen each other for more than ten years and it was a wonderful reunion. I am continually amazed by how you can reconnect with people with whom you’ve lost touch over the years and, if they’re also willing, can start over where you left off!

It was as if no time had passed. (Well, except for the fact that she found a husband and has a baby!) We laughed and cried, ate, talked, shopped … a trip to TJ Maxx, Walmart and Wendy’s were some highlights. At Wendy’s N taught “la boulette” to dip his fries in ketchup! To watch a really cute short video, click here: bouletteatw

Happy Boulette bathes in the kitchen sink!

When it came time to put them on the airplane, the tears were just like those shed in years past. I’d “forgotten” how much I love “my kids” and how much it hurts to say “good bye”. But at the same time, how wonderful is it that I have this little family that isn’t really mine but feels like it!? And I know we’ll be together again (hopefully, soon!)

Bet you thought that I’d forgotten the free knitting pattern, didn’t you?

Nope! Here it is! This is perhaps an ugly blanket because I had to use yarn that I had here and it was very last minute when I realized that a warm blanket was going to be needed – badly needed!

“La Boulette” Blanket (an Original Queen Bee Knits design)

Needles: size 15 circular needle (or larger or smaller to fit your yarn)

Yarn: Vanna’s Choice by Lion Brand 4 skeins, knitted with yarn doubled throughout. (Note: this is a very simple blanket, knitted on the bias. It will make a square blanket and could be knit with ANY yarn and needles appropriate to the yarn weight. Just knit as in the pattern directions until it’s the width that you want and then start the decreases! Easy!)

Blanket Directions:

Cast on 4 sts.

K2, YO, K to end

Turn and K2, YO, K to end of row

Repeat these two rows (which are actually identical) until the blanket is the width that you want.

Middle

K2, YO, K2tog, K to end of row

Turn

Repeat the last row three times more (total of four rows)

now it’s decrease time!

K2, YO, K2tog, knit to 4 sts before end of row, K2tog, K2

Turn

Repeat the last row until there are 4 sts on the needles (decreasing one stitch in each row)

Cast off 4 sts

Weave in all ends

And here’s the little lesson …

How do you count rows when you’re knitting all rows (otherwise known as stockinette stitch)?

Counting Rows for Stockinette Stitch

Each “pair” of bumps, one looks like it arches up like the letter “u” and the other arches down, is a row. In this photo, there are five bump pairs which means that you’ve knitted ten rows … hunh? you say? Yes, you’ve knitted ten rows because there is a corresponding bump on the back of the fabric, too. For each row you see on one side of the fabric, there is a bump on the other side of the fabric when you knit “back”. See what I mean?

Try knitting a few rows. Yup, take out your needles and a single strand of yarn (the sample above is a double strand of yarn). Cast on about 20 stitches and knit across them. Then knit back again. Now … look at what you have. You’ve knitted two rows and there are two “pairs of bumps” one on the right side and one on the wrong side.

If you don’t get it, comment on this post and I’ll illustrate further!

But for now, I’ve gone knitting!

Rock-a-bye Baby

Posted on May 16, 2011 by Queen Bee Knits

I had the honor of rocking a baby to sleep yesterday.

I was in “hog heaven” as N. put it. “La Boulette” was having trouble staying asleep whether from being in a different place, adjusting to a different time zone, new teeth, or something else. He was pooped. When his parents went upstairs to have a nap, I got the baby all to myself and when he picked up his bottle I nabbed his little body and sat with him on my lap in the rocking chair …

My Gram was the only one I’ve ever known who had the heart, the patience and the calm to rock a baby for just as long as the baby wanted or needed. She could rock my first baby – who wouldn’t sit for anything or anyone and was constantly on the go. But she would sit with Gram in her easy chair and rock until the cows came home. Gram would just hum a little song or simply respond to K’s chatter and K would pass from bright-eyed to sleepy-eyed to gonzo. Gram was the one who, despite not having a “pot to piss in”, would buy you the sun and the moon if you asked her. But you didn’t need to ask. Just knowing that you were loved made it unnecessary. She was always my biggest cheerleader! I’m so grateful that I had her in my life.

So “la boulette” and I rocked for an hour or so. Kissed his silky soft hair, smelled his baby skin. I’m not sure that there’s anything more wonderful. He slept and I remembered my Gram. It was a wonderful day!

On Doing the Right Thing

Posted on May 8, 2011 by Queen Bee Knits

I just finished reading another wonderful Jodi Picoult (I just learned that you pronounce it “peek-o”) novel entitled, Sing You Home. I am a total Jodi Picoult fan and have read most if not all of her books. I’d say this one appealed to me a lot and parallels my life in several ways.

I was married for nearly 27 years to a man who I thought was my partner for life. About 9 years ago I uncovered an affair which was devastating. We separated because he didn’t want to give up the person he was having the affair with. A year later, he decided he wanted the marriage and said that he’d ended the other relationship but I found out differently and made the decision to divorce in late 2006.

At about the same time, my first love and I reconnected – he found me on the Internet (go figure!) Anyway, after several months of emails, phone calls and visits, I decided to move to Florida (ancient history now) and found part-time work while I finished my college degree. And then the bottom of the American economy fell out. I’ve become a “long term unemployed” who is making the best of life by building a business that I hope will sustain me in the near future!

Divorce is a strange experience. I never (ever, in a million years) thought I would be divorced. We find ourselves in odd situations for the benefit of the children. Being divorced is not easy. In many ways we’re still a family but everything has changed. Negotiations abound. Recently, my ex has decided to renig on an agreement and stopped paying our daughter’s college loan. Somehow, in the divorce, this loan became my responsibility despite the fact that I had always said that we’d help with the repayment of loans if we were able. Anyway, I’d be delighted to pay the loan if my situation were different. I fully never expected to be unable to find adequate employment for such a long time. I have trouble understanding why, with no warning, no phone call, no text, no nothing, he simply stopped paying the loan. By the time the collection calls began, the loan was more than 30 days late and a week until the next payment was due. And at the end of April we sat across the table celebrating our son’s 21st birthday and he never said a word.

While we were married and the children were young, he had a period of unemployment and I used my “inheritance” to support our family. I didn’t think twice about it, I didn’t ask for anything in return. I did it because it was the right thing to do. “My” money provided us with a down-payment on our first home, renovated another home we purchased and then sold for the mortgage the first time he became unemployed, and provided another down-payment on our home in Ohio when he found employment again. “My” money. “Earned” after the loss of my father. But given openly and freely to help our family. Now that the tide has turned, I’m unemployed, and he’s got an inheritance that could help with this loan if he so chose. Rather, it appears that he is choosing to hurt me. I’m not sure if his intent is to destroy my relationship with my daughter or to ruin me financially – why else would he not have told me that he was going to stop the payments? What he doesn’t seem to see is that he is also hurting our daughter in the process. I am at a loss … Five years later, is he still so bitter that I left the marriage (not like there was a choice when he couldn’t be faithful) that he wants to see me miserable? His parents left everything to him and asked him to “take care of the kids” and his nieces, too. They would want him to take care of their granddaughter. They valued family (at least their “blood”) and I believe that his father, in particular, would be most ashamed of this self-centered behavior.

All of this circles back to the book … don’t worry, I’m getting there. I don’t want to give away the end of the story but suffice it to say that you won’t be able to put it down. Picoult is a phenomenal word smith and addresses what may be her most controversial subject yet, gay rights with a bit of evangelical religion thrown in. Her character development is outstanding and I always find myself caring for the characters in her books … even if I don’t always agree with them. I think Picoult handles this issue with dignity and honesty.

The world we live in is not a perfect place but the choices that people make every day can make it better. Kinder. More caring. I can’t help but believe that we feel better about ourselves when we behave in a caring way toward others … when we do the right thing. I hope my ex will help his daughter and will work with us to find a solution that will be a “win” for each of us. Dealing with issues with an open heart can make the world a better place and allow families grow and heal.

Crazy Socks … Northward Ho!

Posted on April 30, 2011 by Queen Bee Knits

An uneventful trip north this year. Orlando to Atlanta to Cincinnati to Belgrade!

Day 1- Atlanta and a brief overnight visit with the best “Roomie” in the world, my friend Carrie. She’s about the only brave soul who would have us visit with our four-legged brood. And especially with the crazy old Cushingoid cocker who is like having seventeen puppies all rolled into one – we’re never sure if he’s housebroken or if he’ll eat the paintings off the wall.

Day 2 – Cincinnati and a 21^st Birthday dinner with my son, my ex-husband and his boyfriend. Long story short, my ex had picked the dinner spot and it was obscenely expensive and not the most wonderful food ever. Over $500 for five and we only had a glass of wine and my ex’s boyfriend doesn’t drink. The plus side was, however, that I got to spend a few hours with my son. He is a very special kid and I was so happy to see him.

Day 3 – Rochester, NY which is on the way to Maine and there’s nothing special there. It was so windy, however, that the Hobie Cat was blowing away (and the sail wasn’t even up!)

This is a photo from the back seat on day 4 on the way to Marblehead, MA and my youngest brother and his family. Too bad my little boy isn’t getting relaxed in the back seat! He does make us laugh with his antics. We love to visit my brother and his family. My three nephews are growing taller and handsomer every time we see them. Ninth grade, sixth grade and fifth grade this year and they’re all involved in various sports, etc. Ski and snowboarding season is now over so it’s time for track and baseball. Max (our Cocker) got bitten by Caspian (my brother’s German shepherd) who he fought for a ball but still a fun albeit brief visit.

One more photo from day 5 when we stopped at LL Bean this is what I found in the back seat. My little boy, again, this time he’s chosen to sit in my computer bag instead of the seat … go figure. We had to stop in Freeport to get a warm jacket (we also found a jacket for poor old Max who’s losing his hair and shivers or shakes all the time, a couple of gifts for later this summer, and I found a great corduroy shirt that I’ve coveted … and it was on sale! Woo HOO!) After a quick lunch, on to Belgrade and “opening camp”. It’s a lot of work but it seemed like more this year. By the time we got the first floor of the house all wiped down and disinfected and swept out (not too much mouse evidence this year and no skulls), the furniture unwrapped, sopped up the puddle on the bed from the leaking master bedroom roof, and then unpacked the car and put away the groceries, we were beat! Thank God for the good old electric blanket. We climbed into bed and slept like babies and I didn’t get up until nearly 8 am which is unusual because we have no window coverings on the windows and it gets light early here! I did hear the loons calling in the middle of the night but it’s such a sweet sound, I smiled and rolled over.

I had a lot of fun knitting a second pair of stash-busting crazy socks on the way up here. They’re really cute. The first pair went to my sister, Kathy, for her birthday. This pair will likely be a gift for some lucky soul, too. I think they’re fun and they certainly are colorful! The best news is that I still have a ton more bits and pieces of sock yarn to make a few more pairs.

Another 1976 miles of road trip adventure … (ha! That was the year Ned and I first started dating. Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not! Life is good!

All My Bags Are NOT Packed

Posted on April 25, 2011 by Queen Bee Knits

Peter, Paul and Mary had it all … and they must have had some help if they always had their bags packed. I am not ready and here I sit at my desk, blogging away!

This little Yankee can’t waste a couple of rotting bananas so I had to bake some gluten-free banana blueberry muffins this morning. Killed two birds with one stone because I also used up the fresh Florida blueberries from Costco! And then I decided that a batch of “Mom’s Best” Granola was in order for the boy who’s turning 21 on Wednesday. His big gift will arrive on it’s own. I feel so lucky that we’re able to travel and that I can spend a couple hours with my “baby” on his special day.

All these years later, I’ve got some serious regrets that I didn’t wait until he was out of high school before I left Cincinnati. It would have only been a year … of course at the time, my head was reeling, my heart was wounded (and I was sure it was beyond repair) and I had this wonderful man who wanted me with him … or at least in the same town. I also thought that his father would “step up” and take the parenting seriously (since he hadn’t done too much of it when I was there). Not so much. What nobody realized – not me, not his/our therapist – was how much he was drinking and what a mess he really was. He could barely care for himself after my departure and he certainly didn’t do a great job of taking care of my son. I would never have left if I’d realized how poorly cared for my son would be – and that he was going to have to depend on friends on a regular basis. Neither did I realize how hurt he’d be when I left. I knew him as an independent kid who was seldom home. I was alone all the time in that big old house. Housing choices were not plentiful and it was expensive. But, today, looking back with my 20/20 hindsight vision, it would have been a good choice to stay for my son’s sake.

Over the course of the past four years, he’s graduated from high school, successfully completed (nearly) three years of an extremely competitive and demanding college curriculum and learned to brew beer in his apartment, cook like a professional chef, and dress to the nines. I’m really proud of the young man that he’s becoming and I hope he’s proud of himself.

I’m trying to do whatever it takes to rebuild a relationship with my boy. I love him more than life itself and I wish I could go back and un-do what I did. Sadly, it’s done and now I can only try to show him how much he means to me … even if it means spending an extra day or two in the car on an already long trip so I can have dinner with him on his 21st birthday. Happy Birthday (almost) Boy!

The Savages

Posted on March 8, 2011 by Queen Bee Knits

The Savages

We watched a sweet, if somewhat depressing, movie last night. I didn’t think it was going to be one that I liked and was surprised to like it at the end. “The Savages” (Click here to read the NY Times review!) is about a dysfunctional family (like there are families that are not) that doesn’t really seem to have any connection until dad’s girlfriend dies and he’s forced by her family to move out of the house that they shared because of some pre-nup that wasn’t really a pre-nup. Anyway, they move their father to a nursing home in Buffalo and the daughter stays with brother in Buffalo through the holidays and they all get to know each other. The scene that “got me” was when the brother tells the sister that her play is good …

I’ve just lived that scene. A week or so ago, I had a voice mail on my cell phone from my brother’s new wife (my new sister). The gist of the message was that he’d found my blog and was amazed that I was blogging and that he liked my blog. Not only had I whooped his butt in Scrabble when we were out in California for the holidays but I was blogging … and doing it well. He said that he had underestimated his big sister! Abbie said that he was completely blown away … and he said that it was good stuff! It touched me right where it counts because I’ve never been told how special I was and just knowing it myself wasn’t really enough. I needed the outside validation from the people in my life who really mattered. Hearing it from my brother (and sister) felt so great – and I’ve saved the message. It’s a healing thing. Healing from never being good enough for my parents because I was just a girl. My father’s famous phrase was, “Pretty good, Monk” never “Good Job” or “I’m so proud of you.” It was “Of course we love you” during an argument not just “I love you” for no reason.

So, just for today I’m relishing the fact that my younger brother thinks I rock … and it’s really good!

Lacey Thong on the Beach – Merry Christmas!

Posted on December 29, 2010 by Queen Bee Knits

And what a Christmas it was!

You’ll notice I wasn’t blogging because I was trying to finish all the knitting projects for gifts and get everything purchased, wrapped, packed and mailed to my family all over the country. Big brother in LA, sister in AZ, brother in CA, brother in MA and kids in OH, IL, and GA/NY. I love having a growing family! Who knew that it would be increasing exponentially after I turned 50!?

In addition to all that Christmas buzz, my younger brother decided to get married in CA on the Winter Solstice. He’s only 51 years old and never been married! We were all invited to share the nuptials and a week of family time at Stinson Beach, CA.

This is my handsome brother (who wore a suit!) and his lovely bride. My new sister. I still get all teary-eyed when I look at them together. They are truly soul mates. They met in a coffee shop and Abbie tried to match my brother up with her friend Julie. Three years later, they were a match made in heaven. It was the most beautiful wedding ceremony that I’ve ever been privileged to witness – intimate, personal, every bit a reflection of them as a couple.

They aren’t Jewish but with respect for all cultures were married under a huppa (chuppa) which represents the home that the couple will build. Sweet! My brother, the bridegroom, and my son (who wears a different name in California) built the huppa in the garage. When it was time to bring it to the beach-side patio wedding site, it was too big to bring through the house and to wide to bring around the house. So, in typical fashion, it went over the house! Here are my brothers and my sweetie on the beach side of the house after much finagling!

And this is our sweet bride-to-be with her underwear that someone found on the beach. You can imagine the giggles that went on after that find! Abbie handled it all with her wonderful sense of humor and ability to laugh at herself. One of the seven shih tzus (yes, seven! … my two, my brother’s two, my new sister’s two and her sister’s one) who attended the wedding had stolen the pretty lacy panties and traipsed off to the beach to hide them from our bride. She handled the ribbing with grace and humor. What a good sport – and we’re so lucky to have her as the newest member of our family!

We woke up extra early on the first morning we were there (the Winter Solstice, the full lunar eclipse and the wedding day) and watched a beautiful sunrise over San Francisco. Awesome is a great word to use for this experience. The power of the surf, the sound of the sea birds, the breeze (well, perhaps wind is more appropriate!) along with the beautiful sight of the sun rising was a once-in-a-lifetime treat!

I look forward to sharing the new local yarns that I found out there on the left coast! But for now, I hope my photo of sunrise and the pathway to the house will encourage you to take a deep breath, sit back and think of how lucky we are to witness the glory of this earth. With the Pacific Ocean on one side and the mountains on the other, this was a perfect setting for a wedding and a week of family time. I am truly blessed. It was a merry Christmas.

Wishing you peace.
Wishing for peace on Earth.

Venomous Snakes

Posted on November 14, 2010 by Queen Bee Knits

This is a for real sign that I found at a Florida rest area … welcoming, isn’t it? I didn’t even get my dogs out of the car here. I wouldn’t even have stopped if I didn’t have to pee wicked badly. Good grief, I get that they have to warn naive travelers but this is ridiculous!

And speaking of venomous snakes, I feel like one today – my daughter visited from Chicago for a few days and it was the most fun I’ve had for ages. And now, going into the Thanksgiving holiday with none of my kids being here with me again, I am feeling really sad and as if every word that comes out of my mouth is venomous. I don’t mean to be nasty but I can’t help it. I feel like I gave up everything to come here and it’s not worked out like I had hoped it would. It’s hard when you are not a risk taker and then at a crossroads in your life, you decide to take a risk and then it turns out not to be a good move. I guess I’ve learned a lot (always the one to find the silver freaking lining … ) but it’s feeling really crappy going into my favorite holiday of the year.

I’ve always been able to find something to be grateful for and genuinely feel grateful. This year I simply feel wounded and lonely. I certainly hope that my knitting takes off for me in the coming months and that I can find a great location to move to and start over again. Any suggestions? I’m feeling New England in the New Year … maybe 2011 will be the answer to prayers. I need an infusion of happiness. Thank you very much.

This is one of the pairs of “Cooked Lobster Claw” mittens that I packaged and shipped last week. Aren’t they cute as a button? I love them to death. They could also be called “Cooked Crawfish Claw” mittens for those who live in the southern regions … and, frankly it’s a reflection of my family – North and South!

I told you that I had a family miracle to share about my big brother, right? Here you go – this is something that I’m truly grateful for….

After my mother passed away, a cousin of hers contacted my aunt (mom’s sister) and told her that she had information about a baby. She had been sworn to secrecy and had kept the secret until my mother died. Rita shared that my mother and father had conceived a baby boy who was born “out of wedlock” in May of 1956 in California.

When I was a kid, I had heard the story about how my father had chased after the society girls but was dating my mother, a legal secretary. Mom, frustrated with the fact that he hadn’t proposed, moved to California for a year to get away. Dad couldn’t live without her and, ultimately, proposed and they were married in 1957.

My father and mother … circa 1956

Well, what was left out of that old story was that the real reason that Mom went to California was that she was pregnant and unmarried. In 1956 this was a shameful thing. My mother would have been considered “trash” if found out so she sneaked away. On May 30, 1956 a baby boy was born to my mother and was given into the hands of a loving adoptive family. Mom never held him nor saw him. According to Cousin Rita, though, she was very worried about Mom’s mental state. She was isolated and dreadfully depressed. Rita called my Dad who came out to California to visit and shortly thereafter, Mom returned to the east coast and they were engaged and married in September 1957.

So, in 2008, I got word that I had a full-blood big brother somewhere in the world. Against all odds, I called the California County office and was told there was nothing they could tell me. Adoptions from that time were sealed. The Internet was the place to search and I found several sites that are “Adoption Registries” and signed myself up. It didn’t take long before an angel (yes, Virginia, there are real live angels!) who volunteers to help adoptive families and birth families to find each other emailed me with some information about my brother. And then there was another email. And the third … I’ve found your brother! At the bottom of the email was a white pages listing with my brother’s name and address and phone number. So, I called.

A woman answered and I asked for Richard (an amazing coincidence … my younger brother with whom I grew up is also Richard, as was my father). She told me he was out and would be home in a couple of hours. So, I set the timer (yes, literally) for two hours and called again. The answering machine picked up. I started to leave my message and the woman came on … and she turned the phone over to a man. I told him my story (well, my parents’ story) and he asked me a couple of questions about my parents and then he said, “I think I’m your brother.” Wow! We talked for about 45 minutes that first time. Sharing about our children and our lives and our siblings. He had just lost his mother a few weeks prior to my call and was thinking that he only had one blood relative in the whole world … and now he had three blood siblings, nieces and nephews, aunts and uncles and cousins galore.

We’ve since had several opportunities to get together and we’ve started to get to know each other and our extended family. When our younger brother Rick gets married next month, all five of us will be there. Me, my brothers that I grew up with (both younger) and my new big brother and sister. Turns out my big brother had a younger sister and now I have a big sister too.

I think our mothers would be very proud. For that I’m very grateful.