Category Archives: Living

When I Grow Up … I want to be …

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A farmer.

… and a knitter, a spinner and a baker, a potter, a Bed & Breakfast Inn owner, an adventurer, a lover, a singer, a mother-in-law, a grandmother, and probably many other things.

Peas From Our Garden

 

I’m not a very good farmer yet! This year our garden (I am told) was planted too early and the plants were stunted. So, they didn’t really grow. My seeds all died before the plants developed. We did get peas, though! (And some lettuce before it all went to seed overnight!)

There’s an “Open Farm Day” here and this year we took the nephews to visit Winterberry Farm in Belgrade. Mary and her three children are real farmers! They grow everything under the sun and they grow it well. The tomato “house” is amazing, the flowers are beautiful, the animals are happy and healthy (two legged and four legged!) and the children are knowledgeable and so polite. The kids provided tours of the farm and answered questions.

Winterberry Farm Tomato House

Baby Turkey

Do You Know Your Farmer?

Chickens Laying

When I grow up, I want to be like Mary who appears to calmly take everything in stride and is content to be working from dawn to dusk all year long to keep the farm and the children provided for. Baking bread and pies, canning, shearing sheep, spinning the wool, planting and sowing the vegetables, tending the animals (and doling out chores to the three kids because there’s not any way she can do it by herself).

And they have bees from which they make honey! Totally impressive!

We’re off to Portland to find an EZ Pass … when you can’t get to the bank and you’re travelling long distances, it sure does make life easier!

I’ll bring my knitting … don’t worry!

Gone knitting!

 

Laundry Soap Pudding

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Well, we’ve talked about making our own laundry soap and it seems fitting that we would do that here in Maine where because of our proximity to the lake, we feel like we care even more about the earth and what we use on it.

Today we washed (for maybe the first time in their lives) the seat covers on the porch chairs. To be fair, we had to pick two of the same items to see which one cleans better … laundry soap from the store or the soap we made.

No clear results. Our chair cushions were so dirty that we don’t see any noticeable improvement with either soap! Next!? Guess we’ll have to try our clothes and see what happens.

*Queen Bee’s Update* – I’ve got to tell you, this is a great discovery! Not only does this laundry soap really work (clothes are at least as clean as they are when washed in the grocery store soap) but it costs only pennies per load. And it’s easy enough to make and keep! Here’s the recipe:

Grate a bar of Fels Naptha soap into 3 quarts of water. Simmer the water and grated soap mixture until the soap melts. In a bucket filled with a gallon plus 1 quart of water, add 1 cup borax and 1 cup washing soda. Now mix the hot soap mixture into the bucket. Mix well.

That’s it! When you let the mixture sit around it’s going to turn to a pudding-like consistency. It’s not “pretty” but it works and you can buy all the ingredients at the grocery store. We are using 1/2 cup of soap per large load and the clothes are smelling fresh and getting clean! Woo Hoo!

Don’t Bring Your Ferret to Maine

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They say something like, “fish and company stink after three days” and sometimes it’s true. Sometimes it’s not.

My family (thirteen people and eight dogs) was here for nearly a week and there was no “trouble” … no issues, only fun and laughter and cooperation. Everyone pitched in. And we hardly even left “campus”.

It’s bothersome, though, that some people take a visit with others for granted and impose themselves on unsuspecting, welcoming, warm, caring people and then smack them upside the head because they’re unwilling to reciprocate. Or they leave half-consumed beverages to sour in bedrooms. Or they don’t lift a finger to help with cooking and the general upkeep of the house.

Fortunately, we mostly have the experience with friends and family where everyone is willing to strip their beds and even put the sheets in the laundry and they’re more than willing to share with us as we share with them. It’s the exceptions who befuddle me.

On Aging

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Yesterday was my birthday. I’ve aged another year.

Some days I feel “old” and some days I feel young. Thankfully, the days that I feel young still outweigh the other, older days.

Needless to say, yesterday was a wonderful day. My youngest brother and his family (plus two boys) was here for the weekend and the full house is a happy place. We had a super lobster feed on Saturday night and spent a couple of days enjoying each other’s company. Last night we had “old family friends”, our new friends for dinner. It was short but sweet and reaching out to people who we enjoy is a treat.

All in all, aging is not so bad.

Gone knitting.

Hot! Hot! Hot!

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My goodness! It’s not often that we’re really hot in Maine (much more normal in Florida) but whew, today is a stinker!

A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte – Seurat

I got a lot accomplished today, though not a whole ton of knitting because I keep getting sidetracked by a puzzle on the dining room table. I have a thing about puzzles and I have trouble leaving them without putting in just one more piece! All kidding aside, I really do like puzzles and this one is a great French art … George Seurat’s pointillist piece.


My vest is coming along. I admit that I knitted an entire right side row (which should have been the pattern stitch.) I had to frog the entire row – way too much to “repair”. But I’m making progress. Checked the gauge again today and I’m “on the money” so I’m hoping it will fit, too! (That’s always good when you’re knitting a garment … fit, that is!)

Week two of my Human Biology online class is done. I took the quiz today and did OK. It’s a real struggle for me to take a class and memorize information that has no logical application to my life. I know, I know, I’m human and thus it could be interesting – and it is on one level but also way more information than I think I’ll ever use in my next profession. Why it’s required in order to enter the MSW program, I’m not sure. When they admit me, I guess I’ll find out! 🙂

Well, eight minutes are left for my ebay auction … sure do hope I win! I have a very special person that I want to send it to … I love him/her a ton! 🙂

Off I go to watch the last few minutes … refresh buttons are wonderful!

Gone shopping!

Bedlam Farm Journal … A Recommendation

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If you’ve never heard me recommend Jon Katz and his Bedlam Farm Journal blog, hear me now!

This morning, Jon tells a story about having given a sermon and a talk. While I know minimally about his life history, Jon is sage and doesn’t waste words (while I waste them constantly!) In his post he says, “And I said at both that in America, we are led to believe the world is in turmoil and coming apart and that we must be angry and afraid for our lives, for the weather, for our health, about money, about the rest of the world. I said  I didn’t believe this. I said I believe we need to repair the earth, not make it into a political argument. And we need to live our lives, define our own notions of health – healthy people do not live in fear and anger – and lead lives of fulfillment and self-determination. That is the sacred call to life for me.”

What is my sacred call to life?

I agree with Jon. I believe that we are the creators of our own world. We are responsible for our health and the health of the little patch of world we live in. Here in Maine (and in Florida when we’re there) we don’t waste resources. We recycle everything we can. We use “clean” products and keep adding to our list. We eat as locally as possible and work to improve this, too. I value the friendships and family and remind myself of the blessings that I receive daily (well, some days are dark and ugly … I’m human and accept that I still have some growing to do.)

Canine Cousins on the Couch

When was the last time you played with a paddle ball?

We just had my brothers and sisters and my daughter and her boyfriend and eight dogs here visiting for a week. We really only left the “campus” that is Camp Smedley once – to relive the bucolic childhood that we remember in Tenants Harbor, Maine. Thirteen people (ten adults and three kids) and eight dogs got along (my mom would be so pleased!) for a week in a house on the shores of Lake Messalonskee. The visit was too short and painful when they all left – painfully quiet at first and then we simply longed for the good company of people we care about deeply. Sharing this place that means so much to us with our family was very meaningful and will be stored away in the memory as one of the best ever experiences.

Cousins and Cards!

I know I am on this planet to do something that will make a difference. I may have already made it  … I raised three children to be independent and they know that they need to find their own happiness. They have the tools and the “smarts” to do what they need to do to get there and they are all on their way. I have touched the lives and hearts of children, volunteering in the schools, bantering with my kids’ friends. I have held the hands of friends who were struggling and I have mourned their passing. I’ve tried to be supportive of their loved ones left behind – at least I offered to be available and with an open heart. I’ve shared my talents and continue to share the things I love to do. I think there are still great things that I can do and I am learning about myself and discovering what I am passionate about.

Life is full of blessings and the world is a wonderful place to be … if you just believe it is so.

” I’ve Learned” by Omer B. Washington

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I stumbled upon this “poem” (?) on another blog because it was quoted by a friend on facebook … how technology has educated me! Anyway, it is long but it’s worth a good (conscious) read. I’ve added some of my thoughts in living color, of course!

I’ve Learned

I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is be someone who can be loved.
The rest is up to them. (And if they can’t love you, that’s their issue, it’s not about you/me)
I’ve learned that no matter how much I care,
some people just don’t care back.
I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust
and only seconds to destroy it. (Amen to that!)
I’ve learned that it’s not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts. (Life is too short to “waste” on people who don’t have my best interest at heart. I choose to be around healthy, productive, loving, honest people with whom I share something. I don’t have hundreds of good friends but I have a few – and that is good.)
I’ve learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you’d better know something.

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t compare yourself
to the best others can do,
but to the best you can do. (Comparing does no good, it always makes me feel badly.)
I’ve learned that it’s not what happens to people,
It’s what they do about it.
I’ve learned that no matter how thin you slice it,
there are always two sides.
I’ve learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time you’ll see them. (Yup.)
I’ve learned that you can keep going
long after you think you can’t.

I’ve learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done
When it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.
I’ve learned that there are people who love you dearly,
but just don’t know how to show it. (I believe this was my father!)
I’ve learned that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry,
but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.
I’ve learned that true friendship continues to grow even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love. (This is all about my college buddies … who’ve been my friends through thick and thin, married and divorced, happy and sad, sober and drunk. They’re the best gang of girls I could ever have as friends – and it’s been since we were 18!)
I’ve learned that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to
doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have. (I also believe that you can teach people how you want to be treated … if they want to change, they can! And don’t accept anything less that what you want!)

I’ve learned that no matter how good a friend is,
they’re going to hurt you every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.
I’ve learned that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. (Best way to heal and move forward but not easy!)
I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken,
the world doesn’t stop for your grief. (And we shouldn’t expect the world to stop for our broken hearts. It’s nice to have it acknowledged, and nice to acknowledge the grief of others … you may be the only one who’s thought to do it and it’s never a wasted effort!)
I’ve learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.
I’ve learned that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other.
And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do. (Fight fairly. Cruelty is not OK. Period.)
I’ve learned that sometimes you have to put the individual
ahead of their actions.
I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing
and see something totally different.
I’ve learned that no matter the consequences,
those who are honest with themselves go farther in life. (And oh, this is not easy! You have to eat a lot of humble pie when you’re honest with yourself.)
I’ve learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours
by people who don’t even know you. (OMG, this is so true. I found my full-blooded big brother at the age of 50 thanks to a perfect stranger. It was a true miracle!)
I’ve learned that even when you think you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help.

I’ve learned that writing,
as well as talking,
can ease emotional pains. (… and it helps me work through problems or issues in my own time and in my own way – which is the only way that I know how to do things. Someone else may do it differently and that’s what works for them. Doesn’t make my way better or worse – it’s just mine.)
I’ve learned that the people you care most about in life
are taken from you too soon.
I’ve learned that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice
and not hurting people’s feelings and standing up for what you believe.
I’ve learned to love
and be loved.
I’ve learned…

 

… and I’m still learning … actually, I work to learn something new almost every day. That’s the only way that  I can keep improving and keep moving. With a smile on my face, I choose to move forward with love in my heart (and my heart on my sleeve.)

Gone knitting!

 

Rainy Day Activities

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It’s another rainy day in New England and so we took a drive to Freeport where there was a “huge tent sale” advertised and as it was to support a foundation, we thought it was a good one to support. Well, not so much “huge” as “pretty big”. I was thinking yarn and needles and maybe even a spinning wheel (not that I would know what to do with it) or an armoire for the bathroom. Yeah, well, no. But we did buy a $10 canoe paddle (we don’t own a canoe).

While in Freeport, I had to stop for a couple of gifts at L. L. Bean and then while N. went to look at a used canoe … I got dropped off in Bath. Home to Halcyon Yarns. I’ve been there before and loved wandering the store. Halcyon has fiber and just about anything you can imagine for spinning, felting, weaving, knitting, crochet, etc. I have yet to leave the store without saying, “Someday, I want to learn to …” (weave, spin …) I loved a shrug-cowl-thingy that they had as a sample and if they’d had three or four skeins of the yarn in the bargain bin, I’d have bought that too … it’s from the book Cowl Girls which is loaded with cowls that I would love to knit (if I just had more hours in the day!)

Today, after a couple hours of browsing, I left with a big shopping bag full of yarn.

My Haul! 🙂

Cotton (on a cone!) for a vest in a really pretty khaki with a browny-green tint for moi! – and several other gift items that I want to make for birthdays and Christmas. (Yes, I’m already thinking ahead to Christmas!) A couple of pairs of worsted weight socks, alpaca fingerless gloves, mittens and a couple of patterns. The best part is that with the exception of the yarn for my vest and the aaforementioned pair of mittens that I’ve been wanting to knit (you’ve seen the Bella mittens from Ravelry?), all of the yarn was half price or just about half price. So, when the total was rung up, I was so excited! Such a deal!

All knitters know that this is an expensive habit. Today I celebrated clearance bins!

When we got just a little bit lost on the way back home, the second (or was it third?) dead end we came upon, we decided to stop to let the dogs out to do their business and saw a bird that I don’t think I’ve ever seen before … I consulted the bird book that lives in the car and found that it was a bobolink. They are really pretty little birds and we enjoyed watching a couple of males and a female fly around this lovely field that we “found”. Thanks for the photo to the Cornell Lab of Ornithology website … if you like birds, you’ll love this site!

After that, we decided to follow Ethel’s (our GPS) directions and we actually made it home.

Now, dear readers, I’m going to upload a couple of photos for you and then I’m outta here. New fiber means new knitting adventures!

Paris, here I come (I hope)

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So, it’s a long story but I’m entering a contest and I could win a trip to Paris for two! Yikes! How cool is that?!

Suffice it to say that I’d love to visit Paris. It’s been on my bucket list for ages and now that I have my first “grand baby” to visit over there, it’d be even more wonderful. Seeing Flo and Francois, Laure and Stan and darling little Olivia, Elise and her husband and Boston Terrier, meeting Marie France and Claire (finally) – O.M.G! It would be wonderful to win.

So, here’s the link if you’d like to win – Oh Happy Day Goes to Paris -I’m all about sharing the wealth (and if you win, you must take the Queen Bee!) Good luck!

My fingers are crossed. It’s going to be tough knitting today! 🙂

 

On Losing One’s Self

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I’m reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s book, Committed. If you’ve ever been married, are married or are thinking about getting married one day, it’s a good read and may teach you a thing or two about the institution of marriage. Ultimately, her story has a happy ending …

Click on the Amazon "ad" to the right if you'd like to purchase this book!

Gilbert’s first marriage ended, suffice it to say, in a flaming ball of fire. And upon falling in love a second time, she was skeptical about entering into another marriage. I can get this! Having “failed” once, who wants to go running back for more? I don’t care how much one loves somebody, it’s a frightening concept to try again at something that didn’t work the first time.

Some of Gilbert’s research is interesting and I hadn’t realized that men benefit more from being married than women do (although it makes sense.) Apparently men are happier, healthier and more financially stable when they are married. Women, however, don’t benefit nearly as well. Income is likely to drop by seven percent for married women. They are more likely to suffer from depression and die in a catastrophic accident. Maybe because most married women are so stretched … working, caring for a husband, children and home is a lot of work and the book says that most men don’t share equally in the household or child-rearing responsibilities. It is also said that women who wait to get married until they’re more established are more likely to be happier when they’re married. So, having read most of this quick read, my advice to women is WAIT!

I was a “baby” when I got married at twenty-two and had my first child when I was twenty-six. I absolutely agree with Gilbert that you can lose yourself in marriage. Especially when there are children. I have been reclaiming myself for the last few years. I’m not saying that I have regrets because being able to stay at home and parent my three kids was a blast. I really enjoyed it and I was (and am) a good parent. Anyway, I loved volunteering in my community and we had a great neighborhood babysitting co-op when the kids were little so I had a great support system. My children became my life and I let myself slip to the back of the line. Everyone else’s needs came first (partly because they were more vocal, I think) and I didn’t understand the premise that if you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t care for everyone else. Needless to say, when my youngest went off to school, my world came crashing down in a horrible bout of depression that put me in bed for nearly six weeks. It was debilitating and frightening and there were times when I truly believed that I was going to die. One of my doctors wanted to do a spinal tap and that’s what sent me to a new doc who diagnosed my with depression and put  me on medication and, sure enough, after a couple of weeks I was able to get myself out of bed and out into the sunshine and back into life. It was the start of me taking time for myself and investing in myself – I started walking regularly and seeing a great therapist (or three) who have helped guide me to knowing myself.

I’ve been extremely fortunate to be able to get off the meds and haven’t had a relapse in years. I used to have a bit of a “down turn” at the end of summer when the kids went back to school. No dancing in the aisles at Staples for me! I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve and can get upset, don’t get me wrong. I’ve spent several days at a time in my house/apartment/condo when my mother died and I was grieving. I did the same several months later when we buried her. The good news is that I know where to go when I need to get help and I now have the tools that I need to get myself back “on track”. I’m a lot happier when I remember to do something for me … and my knitting feeds that piece!

And now, I find myself in love with a man who (I think) would like to get married again. Some days I feel like that would be wonderful and some days not so much. Isn’t living together enough? So, I continue to invest in myself and follow my heart …